Birthday Cards


Hurrah! At Last I'm 40
Outside: Hurrah! At Last I'm 40! Inside: Happy Birthday
$2.50
Availability: Available for Order
8320020
Too Young to Buy Birthday Card
Outside: Tell me I look too young to buy this wine, ask to see my ID Card and nobody gets hurt.
Inside: I had no ID it was your birthday again. Happy Birthday.
$3.50
77292
Cake Dance
Happy Birthday. Have a Little Cake Do a Little Dance
$3.95
Availability:
4003970
Office Whore of the Month
You made office whore of the month. Again. You made worst supply room lay.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
062566
Man on Sick Bed with "Doctor"
What's the bad new? I'm not a doctor. Have a feel good birthday.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
062757
Whatever age you're claiming
Happy Birthday! You don't look a day over whatever age you're claiming to be!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
0300401
What's a Depository? Birthday Card
Outside: I said, you have a suppository in your ear so I think I know where your hearing aid is.
What's a depository?
Inside: I hear it's your birthday. Party on.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
94245
Buried Nuts Birthday Card
Outside: You're not goin' anywhere, Roy. You buried your own nuts again.
Inside: Ahhh, nuts...you can't hide it...you're a year older!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30027
Lorenzoni - Birthdays Are Good For You
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that people who have the most live the longest!
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
011915
Do I Come Here Often?
Outside: Hello, gorgeous! Do I come here often?
Inside: Have an unforgettable Birthday!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
96899
Dog Stuck to Fridge
Outside: Well, tell me, Randy. Has someone eaten all the refrigerator magnets again?
Inside: Happy Birthday to a magnetic personality!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93968
Money I Could Have Saved
That's the money I could have saved had I not married you 25 years ago. Happy Birthday, big spender.
$2.95
Availability:
4764
Off the Cliff Texting
Outside: I think I'm finally getting the hang of this 'texting' thing.
Inside Reads: :) B-DAY 2 U!
$2.95
Availability:
4327
*Rather Drink My Martini
I'd rather drink my martini than put on a bikini! At our age it's best to leave something to the imagination. Here's to one more year and a little more fabric.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
97554
Henopause Birthday Card
"Outside: My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm..."
Oh, Lordy. Henopause!
Inside: You may not be a spring chicken, but you're still a tasty dish. Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30026
Happy Birthday Yellow Flowers
$2.95
Availability:
40027005
Happy Birthday Seahorse
$2.95
Availability:
40027022
You're Not Old Dentures
$2.95
Availability:
40027043
Dog Wants to Go Out
Outside: Helen, I think the dog wants to go out.
Inside: Always the party animal. Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
96667
Happy Birthday You Old Hoe
$2.95
Availability:
40027080
Happy Birthday You Old Prick
$2.95
Availability:
40027107
Happy Birthday You Old Bag
$2.95
Availability:
40027112
Two Old Cowboys Birthday Card
Inside: Every year your coolness increases. Happy Birthday!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
14314
Blame That One Birthday Card
Outside: Try to blame that one on the dog.
Heard you were letting loose with another big one. Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93679
My Dog
My dog ate your birthday present. You can have my dog if you want.
$3.50
Availability:
4000344
Bratty Kids
When your kids act bratty people secretly like you better. I however always like you. Happy Birthday.
$3.50
Availability:
4000443
Multiple Personality Birthday Card
Outside: Welcome! Multiple Personality Support Group. "Get Acquainted" Night.
Inside: Happy Birthday from all of us!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30084
Florida
Someday when we're in Florida racing golf carts in bejeweled sweatsuits this will all seem hilarious. Happy Birthday Friend till the end.
$3.50
Availability:
4000450
Two Old Ladies at Table Birthday Card
Outside: At our age we can do lots of things younger women can't.
Inside: Like growing a mustache. Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
15821
On the Internet
Outside: On the internet you said you were tall. On the internet you said you were blond.
Inside: On the internet they said you were a year older.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30078
Pop-up Thermometer Birthday Card
Outside: Don't be alarmed, Edna. But there appears to be a pop-up thermometer protruding from your right buttock.
Inside: Oh no! Just when you're not looking up pops another Birthday!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30081
Golfer with Axe Birthday Card
Inside: Any way you slice it, you're the best. Happy Birthday
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
96063
Dear, Abby
"Dear Abby: I continually find myself asking for advise from complete strangers. Please help." It's your birthday. Get all the help you can!
$2.95
Availability:
085013
Monte's Water Bowl Birthday Card
Outside: Geez, Monte. You're not gonna believe what the old man just did in your water bowl.
Inside: Bottom's up. It's your birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
94246
GOT DRUNK AT THE PROM
Mom says she brought me into the world because she and dad love me very much and wanted me to be a part of their lives. She had you because she got drunk at the prom.
$3.50
Availability:
001367
Porta Potty Birthday Card
Outside: Our sources show this is a heavily trafficked building of importance with ample storage. This must be their nation's capitol.
Inside: Our sources show you are another year older. Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30054
Nobody Has Fun
Outside: Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why.
Inside: Holy crap! It's your birthday! Hope it hits the spot.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
97660
Venti Vodka Vallium Latte To Go
OUTSIDE: I'D LIKE A VENTI VODKA VALLIUM MOCHA LATTE TO GO!
INSIDE: TIME TO FUEL UP FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
97627
Terrorist Dog
Bad dog! ... Hope your birthday is da' bomb.
$2.95
Availability:
7911
Unicorns Noah Birthday Card
Outside: Big storm's a brewin. Then I'm glad we didn't go on that cruise with your whack-job friend Noah.
Inside: Don't miss the boat. Have a Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30047
Baby Nursing Home Road
Outside: Some day I'll be choosing your nursing home.
Inside: Just remember. . .that day is coming sooner than you think! Happy Birthday!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30032
Dang Car Keys
Outside: Now where did I put them dang car keys?
Inside: Another year lost. Happy Birthday!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93777
Hairpiece Chin Strap Birthday Card
Outside: How'd you know it was a hairpiece? I think it was the chin strap.
Inside: Getting better looking every year.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30082
Windy Thursday Beer
Outside: It's windy. No. Thursday. Me too! Let's get some beers!
Inside: Have a happy birthday, that's one thing we can all agree on.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30044
Very Angry Birds Birthday Card
Inside: No need to squawk, it's just another birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30118
Man With Cigar
Happy freakin' Birthday.
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
210235
Postal Cracks Birthday Card
Inside: Best regards and Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93754
STAMP "Fuck it"
Outside: Fuck It
Inside Reads: Another Birthday? Another year older? Fuck it!
$2.95
Availability:
4728
Adult Diaper Thong
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30030
Because We're Both Bitches
Outside: I think we get along so well because we're both bitches.
Inside Reads: Hope your birthday is bitchalicious!
$2.95
Availability:
0770
Minister in Bathroom Birthday Card
Outside: Holy Water. Holy Shit.
Inside: Holey, moley it's your birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30083
Beer Birthday Card
Outside: Does this beer make me look fat?
Inside: Can't stomach the idea of getting older? Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30058
Viagra & Prozac
I take my Viagra with Prozac. If it doesn't work, I don't care. Don't let your birthday get you down. Happy Birthday!
$2.95
Availability:
5032
Lost Puppy Birthday Card
Inside: Birthdays can really be a pain in the butt! Have a good one.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93690
Flying Squirrel Birthday Card
Outside: Well, there you go. I guess Frank wasn't a flying squirrel after all.
Inside: Hope you're flying high on your birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
95776
That One's Male Birthday Card
Outside: I think that one's male.
Inside: Happy Birthday. Let the beer and testosterone flow.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30076
Practice Your Sand Wedge Outside
Outside: Look. Jerome. Unless you want me to crap on the bed, I'd suggest you practice your sand wedge outside.
Inside: Get a grip. It's just another birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
97185
Or Am I Crazy?
Is it warm in here or am I crazy? Warm Birthday Wishes!
$2.95
Availability:
7921
VODKA GIRL
Vodka Girl: Saving the world and not remembering most of it the next day! *POW*
Inside Reads: Happy Birthday. Bottoms up!
$2.95
Availability:
7471
World that works - Birthday
To a world that works for everyone, and to you who brings so much to this world (and mine). Happy Birthday.
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
570907
Llama
Another birthday. Time to shave that llama. Or maybe you celebrate differently where your from.
$3.95
ske702
Spider Veins
Spider Veins crows feet and cankles oh my. Let's toast to our inner beauty. Happy Birthday.
$3.50
Availability:
4004649
Elect a Friggin' Moron
I still think we should include something in the constitution in case the people elect a Friggin' Moron. ... Your birthday constitutes a celebration! Happy Birthday!
$2.95
Availability:
007534
Get Well, Elephant Sick in Bed
$3.95
Availability: Available for Order
2104501
Paws and Relax
Paws and relax.
$2.99
Availability: Available for Order
2146198
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Old Woman Whoop
Another birthday, eh? Whoop-de-frickin' do.
$2.99
Availability: Available for Order
2146426
Woman in Grapes
Eveything gets better with age. Happy Birthday.
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
241574
Captain's Log
Yeah, that's a captain's log all right.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
059245
Farmer and Sheep
It's your birthday… Get freaky!!!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
061613
See Dick, See Jane
Checklist for any occasion inside.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
3061828
Woman Dricing Off Cliff
Monica had to choose between driving off a cliff or admitting her real age. She'll be missed.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
062375
Sorry I Shit on Your Carpet
Outside: I'm in a hurry. Got any "Sorry I crapped on your carpet" cards?
Inside: Happy Birthday
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30010
Nurse with Woman
Please step onto the livestock scale.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
063181
Rum? Gin? Tequila?
Sorry, no booze at this party. Where is the fucking exit?
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
063228
Duck Decoy Birthday Card
Inside: Shoot, here comes another birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93759
Homeless Man Called You?
Hope you get everything you want for your birthday!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
063235
A Little Gray Hare
A little grey hare looks good on you. Happy Birthday.
$2.99
Availability: Available for Order
2146471
Old Man On Bike
Getting older ain't for sissies. Happy Birthday.
$2.99
Availability: Available for Order
2146716
Rub This Spot
Spot hopes you enjoy your day as much as he just enjoyed his!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
051690
Woman With Spitz's Beer
Old people are so cute when they're fucked up!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
054363
Man's Guide to Aging
A Man's Guide To Successful Aging
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
054905
The Perks of being over 50
The Perks of being over 50: contains a list inside. Happy Birthday!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
058156
Hooker and Drug Dealer
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
059931
Café Mocha Vodka Marijuana Latte
Drink up, it's your birthday!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
061866
Record
To a true classic. You're still #1 on my playlist.
$3.95
Availability: Available for Order
GA-DX4816
Dog Burying A Bone
Holy *#%!@ it's your birthday again?
$3.35
Availability: Available for Order
GA-R5462
Octopus Holding Cupcakes
May all your wishes come true.
$3.95
Availability: Available for Order
GA-X5725
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