Birthday Cards


Hurrah! At Last I'm 40
Outside: Hurrah! At Last I'm 40! Inside: Happy Birthday
$2.50
Availability: Available for Order
8320020
Too Young to Buy Birthday Card
Outside: Tell me I look too young to buy this wine, ask to see my ID Card and nobody gets hurt.
Inside: I had no ID it was your birthday again. Happy Birthday.
$3.50
77292
Cake Dance
Happy Birthday. Have a Little Cake Do a Little Dance
$3.95
Availability:
4003970
This item is currently out of stock!
Office Whore of the Month
You made office whore of the month. Again. You made worst supply room lay.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
062566
Man on Sick Bed with "Doctor"
What's the bad new? I'm not a doctor. Have a feel good birthday.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
062757
Whatever age you're claiming
Happy Birthday! You don't look a day over whatever age you're claiming to be!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
0300401
What's a Depository? Birthday Card
Outside: I said, you have a suppository in your ear so I think I know where your hearing aid is.
What's a depository?
Inside: I hear it's your birthday. Party on.
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
94245
Buried Nuts Birthday Card
Outside: You're not goin' anywhere, Roy. You buried your own nuts again.
Inside: Ahhh, nuts...you can't hide it...you're a year older!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30027
Lorenzoni - Birthdays Are Good For You
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that people who have the most live the longest!
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
011915
Do I Come Here Often?
Outside: Hello, gorgeous! Do I come here often?
Inside: Have an unforgettable Birthday!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
96899
This item is currently out of stock!
Dog Stuck to Fridge
Outside: Well, tell me, Randy. Has someone eaten all the refrigerator magnets again?
Inside: Happy Birthday to a magnetic personality!
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
93968
Money I Could Have Saved
That's the money I could have saved had I not married you 25 years ago. Happy Birthday, big spender.
$3.50
4764
Off the Cliff Texting
Outside: I think I'm finally getting the hang of this 'texting' thing.
Inside Reads: :) B-DAY 2 U!
$3.50
4327
*Rather Drink My Martini
I'd rather drink my martini than put on a bikini! At our age it's best to leave something to the imagination. Here's to one more year and a little more fabric.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
97554
This item is currently out of stock!
Henopause Birthday Card
"Outside: My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm..."
Oh, Lordy. Henopause!
Inside: You may not be a spring chicken, but you're still a tasty dish. Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30026
Happy Birthday Yellow Flowers
$2.95
Availability:
40027005
Happy Birthday Seahorse
$2.95
Availability:
40027022
You're Not Old Dentures
$2.95
Availability:
40027043
Dog Wants to Go Out
Outside: Helen, I think the dog wants to go out.
Inside: Always the party animal. Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
96667
Happy Birthday You Old Hoe
$2.95
Availability:
40027080
Happy Birthday You Old Prick
$2.95
Availability:
40027107
Happy Birthday You Old Bag
$2.95
Availability:
40027112
Two Old Cowboys Birthday Card
Inside: Every year your coolness increases. Happy Birthday!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
14314
This item is currently out of stock!
Blame That One Birthday Card
Outside: Try to blame that one on the dog.
Heard you were letting loose with another big one. Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93679
My Dog
My dog ate your birthday present. You can have my dog if you want.
$3.50
Availability:
4000344
This item is currently out of stock!
Bratty Kids
When your kids act bratty people secretly like you better. I however always like you. Happy Birthday.
$3.50
Availability:
4000443
This item is currently out of stock!
Multiple Personality Birthday Card
Outside: Welcome! Multiple Personality Support Group. "Get Acquainted" Night.
Inside: Happy Birthday from all of us!
$2.75
Availability: Available for Order
30084
Florida
Someday when we're in Florida racing golf carts in bejeweled sweatsuits this will all seem hilarious. Happy Birthday Friend till the end.
$3.95
4000450
Two Old Ladies at Table Birthday Card
Outside: At our age we can do lots of things younger women can't.
Inside: Like growing a mustache. Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
15821
This item is currently out of stock!
On the Internet
Outside: On the internet you said you were tall. On the internet you said you were blond.
Inside: On the internet they said you were a year older.
$2.75
Availability: Available for Order
30078
Pop-up Thermometer Birthday Card
Outside: Don't be alarmed, Edna. But there appears to be a pop-up thermometer protruding from your right buttock.
Inside: Oh no! Just when you're not looking up pops another Birthday!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30081
This item is currently out of stock!
Golfer with Axe Birthday Card
Inside: Any way you slice it, you're the best. Happy Birthday
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
96063
Dear, Abby
"Dear Abby: I continually find myself asking for advise from complete strangers. Please help." It's your birthday. Get all the help you can!
$3.50
085013
Monte's Water Bowl Birthday Card
Outside: Geez, Monte. You're not gonna believe what the old man just did in your water bowl.
Inside: Bottom's up. It's your birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
94246
This item is currently out of stock!
GOT DRUNK AT THE PROM
Mom says she brought me into the world because she and dad love me very much and wanted me to be a part of their lives. She had you because she got drunk at the prom.
$3.50
Availability:
001367
This item is currently out of stock!
Porta Potty Birthday Card
Outside: Our sources show this is a heavily trafficked building of importance with ample storage. This must be their nation's capitol.
Inside: Our sources show you are another year older. Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30054
This item is currently out of stock!
Nobody Has Fun
Outside: Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why.
Inside: Holy crap! It's your birthday! Hope it hits the spot.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
97660
This item is currently out of stock!
Venti Vodka Vallium Latte To Go
OUTSIDE: I'D LIKE A VENTI VODKA VALLIUM MOCHA LATTE TO GO!
INSIDE: TIME TO FUEL UP FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION!
$2.75
Availability: Available for Order
97627
This item is currently out of stock!
Terrorist Dog
Bad dog! ... Hope your birthday is da' bomb.
$3.50
7911
Unicorns Noah Birthday Card
Outside: Big storm's a brewin. Then I'm glad we didn't go on that cruise with your whack-job friend Noah.
Inside: Don't miss the boat. Have a Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30047
Baby Nursing Home Road
Outside: Some day I'll be choosing your nursing home.
Inside: Just remember. . .that day is coming sooner than you think! Happy Birthday!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30032
This item is currently out of stock!
Dang Car Keys
Outside: Now where did I put them dang car keys?
Inside: Another year lost. Happy Birthday!
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93777
This item is currently out of stock!
Hairpiece Chin Strap Birthday Card
Outside: How'd you know it was a hairpiece? I think it was the chin strap.
Inside: Getting better looking every year.
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
30082
Windy Thursday Beer
Outside: It's windy. No. Thursday. Me too! Let's get some beers!
Inside: Have a happy birthday, that's one thing we can all agree on.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30044
Very Angry Birds Birthday Card
Inside: No need to squawk, it's just another birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30118
This item is currently out of stock!
Man With Cigar
Happy freakin' Birthday.
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
210235
This item is currently out of stock!
Postal Cracks Birthday Card
Inside: Best regards and Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93754
STAMP "Fuck it"
Outside: Fuck It
Inside Reads: Another Birthday? Another year older? Fuck it!
$3.50
4728
Adult Diaper Thong
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30030
Because We're Both Bitches
Outside: I think we get along so well because we're both bitches.
Inside Reads: Hope your birthday is bitchalicious!
$3.50
0770
Minister in Bathroom Birthday Card
Outside: Holy Water. Holy Shit.
Inside: Holey, moley it's your birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30083
This item is currently out of stock!
Beer Birthday Card
Outside: Does this beer make me look fat?
Inside: Can't stomach the idea of getting older? Happy Birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30058
This item is currently out of stock!
Viagra & Prozac
I take my Viagra with Prozac. If it doesn't work, I don't care. Don't let your birthday get you down. Happy Birthday!
$3.50
5032
Lost Puppy Birthday Card
Inside: Birthdays can really be a pain in the butt! Have a good one.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93690
Flying Squirrel Birthday Card
Outside: Well, there you go. I guess Frank wasn't a flying squirrel after all.
Inside: Hope you're flying high on your birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
95776
That One's Male Birthday Card
Outside: I think that one's male.
Inside: Happy Birthday. Let the beer and testosterone flow.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30076
This item is currently out of stock!
Practice Your Sand Wedge Outside
Outside: Look. Jerome. Unless you want me to crap on the bed, I'd suggest you practice your sand wedge outside.
Inside: Get a grip. It's just another birthday.
$2.75
Availability: Available for Order
97185
Or Am I Crazy?
Is it warm in here or am I crazy? Warm Birthday Wishes!
$3.50
7921
VODKA GIRL
Vodka Girl: Saving the world and not remembering most of it the next day! *POW*
Inside Reads: Happy Birthday. Bottoms up!
$3.50
7471
World that works - Birthday
To a world that works for everyone, and to you who brings so much to this world (and mine). Happy Birthday.
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
570907
Llama
Another birthday. Time to shave that llama. Or maybe you celebrate differently where your from.
$3.95
ske702
This item is currently out of stock!
Spider Veins
Spider Veins crows feet and cankles oh my. Let's toast to our inner beauty. Happy Birthday.
$3.50
Availability:
4004649
This item is currently out of stock!
Elect a Friggin' Moron
I still think we should include something in the constitution in case the people elect a Friggin' Moron. ... Your birthday constitutes a celebration! Happy Birthday!
$3.50
007534
Get Well, Elephant Sick in Bed
$3.95
Availability: Available for Order
2104501
This item is currently out of stock!
Paws and Relax
Paws and relax.
$2.99
Availability: Available for Order
2146198
This item is currently out of stock!
Old Woman Whoop
Another birthday, eh? Whoop-de-frickin' do.
$2.99
Availability: Available for Order
2146426
This item is currently out of stock!
Woman in Grapes
Eveything gets better with age. Happy Birthday.
$2.95
Availability: Available for Order
241574
This item is currently out of stock!
Captain's Log
Yeah, that's a captain's log all right.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
059245
Farmer and Sheep
It's your birthday… Get freaky!!!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
061613
See Dick, See Jane
Checklist for any occasion inside.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
3061828
Woman Dricing Off Cliff
Monica had to choose between driving off a cliff or admitting her real age. She'll be missed.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
062375
Sorry I Shit on Your Carpet
Outside: I'm in a hurry. Got any "Sorry I crapped on your carpet" cards?
Inside: Happy Birthday
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
30010
This item is currently out of stock!
Nurse with Woman
Please step onto the livestock scale.
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
063181
Rum? Gin? Tequila?
Sorry, no booze at this party. Where is the fucking exit?
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
063228
Duck Decoy Birthday Card
Inside: Shoot, here comes another birthday.
$3.25
Availability: Available for Order
93759
Homeless Man Called You?
Hope you get everything you want for your birthday!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
063235
A Little Gray Hare
A little grey hare looks good on you. Happy Birthday.
$2.99
Availability: Available for Order
2146471
This item is currently out of stock!
Old Man On Bike
Getting older ain't for sissies. Happy Birthday.
$2.99
Availability: Available for Order
2146716
This item is currently out of stock!
Rub This Spot
Spot hopes you enjoy your day as much as he just enjoyed his!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
051690
Woman With Spitz's Beer
Old people are so cute when they're fucked up!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
054363
Man's Guide to Aging
A Man's Guide To Successful Aging
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
054905
The Perks of being over 50
The Perks of being over 50: contains a list inside. Happy Birthday!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
058156
Hooker and Drug Dealer
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
059931
Café Mocha Vodka Marijuana Latte
Drink up, it's your birthday!
$3.50
Availability: Available for Order
061866
Record
To a true classic. You're still #1 on my playlist.
$3.95
Availability: Available for Order
GA-DX4816
Dog Burying A Bone
Holy *#%!@ it's your birthday again?
$3.35
Availability: Available for Order
GA-R5462
Octopus Holding Cupcakes
May all your wishes come true.
$3.95
Availability: Available for Order
GA-X5725
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